in the oral phase, love is to devour. beets are essential, they gush open bloodily and satisfy the desire with no object. glistening on the plate, on the utensil, between white teeth lined up, enameled soldiers, also glistening, then destroying.
toute domination est reciproque. avec le temps il est de plus en plus evident. personne n'est épargné, ni veut l'être. être guéri, c'est être aimé. être aimé, c'est être conquis, à la limite, être détruit. nous tous sommes tyrans à nous même. mieux de tomber.
in the beginning, there were two beings, ruined by an angel disguised as a snake. he felt great regret, but took them anyway, these best-loved prizes of a god he could not bend or destroy. what a famous nightmare! and how internalized! no, no i was led astray. there is always a bad hand before me, i must always be refusing, we like to say. often i know the bad hand is my own, and the devil is otherwise occupied. lately, refusal is a friend, and these hands are doing my own work. the devil is bored, and glosses his jewel eye over and onto other prey. illustrator of longing, he heaves his swollen heart and his selfish desires over infinite hills towards a constantly retreating dawn. night never lifts fully-- the beast that cannot cry has a least the right to bodies and movement. he satisfies his hungers in other ways. moi, je ne trouve pas mes satisfactions en substituant ceci pour cela. j'ouvre mes espaces vides aux jours et aux nuits.
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